Patience and Self-Control.

Last night God was really testing my patience and self-control. Long story short, used to be really good friend turned jerk who hates me was really testing me.
I'm at my bff's house for her birthday dinner. He walks in, hugs both my best friends and then walks away. He did not make eye contact with me the entire night. The only interaction we had was when he cleared everyone's plates and he said excuse me as he reached for mine. Ugh. So many choice words I'd like to lay him out with. I really don't know what I did to deserve this. One day we're friends and we're chillin', the next he wants nothing to do with me and tells me to stay out of his life. Really? I don't get it. I probably never will. But one thing that makes this all extremely hard for me is that I have no problem confronting people. And if the opportunity presented itself, I'd confront him. I would just have to be really careful with my words. I know I can cut him deep easily. And I don't want to do that. I'm sure we'll never be friends again, but he could at least be civil towards me. There are some people in my life that I don't like as much as he doesn't like me. But I can at least put on a smile and be civil towards them. You might call that being fake. But it keeps the peace. You don't have to fully interact with them, just be kind.
In a few weeks I wont have to see him for a couple months. That makes me sad and happy at the same time.

I don't even know how to ask God for help on this one. I don't know what I should/shouldn't do. I don't know anything.
I do know, that as I continue to stay involved in this, it is only hurting me. Maybe him, but I'll never know. It's a sick relationship. I'll admit that. But I don't want to let it go. I don't want to give up. I don't want him to be alone.

Hmmm...